In my DM’s…Minisode #1

Sarah Milken 00:00:00  I'm still looking for my endorphins. I'm literally on a search brigade for them. I am looking and I can't find them. Hey peeps, welcome to the Flexible Neurotic Podcast. I'm your host, doctor Sarah Millican. Yeah, you heard that right. I'm a real PhD doctor. Long, long ago, like last fucking year, I was sitting in the midlife funk wondering, was this it for me? That day, I realized I needed to get off my ass and start my midlife remix. I dusted off my PhD, wiped the menopause sweat off my forehead, grabbed my golden shit shovel, and started digging deep to all my midlife bitches. It's not just luck, coffee, and hormones that get you through your midlife remix. It's action steps. Let's do this. Welcome back to the Flexible Neurotic Podcast. I'm Doctor Sarah Millican, the flexible neurotic. Today is a different kind of episode. Today we are doing slide into my DMs, get chatty with me, all the things eventually we're going to be doing, Collins and the whole nine yards.

Sarah Milken 00:01:18  So let's just start. I want to read a few of the DMs that I've gotten in the past couple of days and get into it. Okay?

Sarah Milken  00:01:29  Okay.

Sarah Milken 00:01:31  My new routine is to lift the dumb weights. As you guys know, if you're following along, you know that I call weightlifting the dumb and necessary weight. So a lot of the Instagram followers reference that in messages or whatever. So that's what she's talking about. My new routine is to lift the dumb weights with my trainer and say, fuck. And why is this so hard a million times? Then get on the treadmill for 30 minutes and listen to your podcast. I love it and it makes the stupid treadmill not quite as bad. I'm sure the people around me think I'm crazy because I'm either saying yes or laughing while I listen to you. Thank you for making the stupid treadmill. Not so bad. Okay, you guys, let's talk about this. I'm really sorry. I don't love working out. I know a lot of you do, and a lot of you don't.

Sarah Milken 00:02:24  You know, they say, like, you get those fucking endorphins. I'm still looking for my endorphins I like, I'm searching. I'm literally on a search brigade for them. I am looking and I can't find them. I do the treadmill. I don't find my endorphins. I do the weights, I don't find my endorphins. And I have to fucking blow dry my hair or get a blow dry. So I have to figure out my blow dry schedule and my workout schedule, and what workout is going to create a necessary blow dry. It's high level shit, you guys, but I'm going to say I'm not alone because I posted that on my Instagram the other day. A poll that says do you plan your blow dries around your workouts? And literally 50% of the people said yes. So although my husband makes fun of me and everyone's like, your fucking hair, oh my God. The trainer asked if I could work out on Friday and I was like, sorry, it's hair day. He's like, I've heard you mention hair like three times.

Sarah Milken 00:03:21  And I'm like, yeah, it's all about the hair. I mean, like, you would think I was like a hair model or I was like, Giselle. No, just a midlife woman with thinning hair who needs to make sure that it's as volumizing as possible. That's it. Okay. The dumb Wade's the name came from the fact that I hate it. Great. Necessary came from the fact that, as you guys know, all of our midlife bodies, brains, minds, all of it need to lift weights. Lifting weights is essential. Muscle is the number one organ in longevity. Muscle is number one. It's the biggest pain in my ass and I dread it. But I do it anyway. It also helps when you have friends who do it or spouses who do it because my husband, he hates it too, actually lifts three times a week. So I'm like, fuck, he did it, so I have to do it too. And like, there are some people who just fucking love it and I fucking hate them because I wish I loved it.

Sarah Milken 00:04:19  I wish, wish, wish. I actually have to dig deep to do it. So like this woman's DM said, love it, hate it, fuck it, say it's stupid, all the things. But just do it, okay? We're in it. We're doing it. Do what you can. You don't have to bend over backwards and, you know, run a 26 mile marathon, but you need to do the basic shit for your body and your brain. Okay. Next. Yeah. Hi, Sarah. Question regarding your midlife science experiment. Okay. Let me back up for a second. The midlife science experiments started about a month ago. I'm 49 years old. I know we've talked about this a million times. I still take birth control pills. I'm coming off of them. I've been on them since I was 14. I know it's a big deal. I totally get it. But if you're someone who's been on a birth control pill for a thousand years, you don't just go off one day.

Sarah Milken 00:05:19  You do your fucking research. So of course, I've met with like six different doctors coming up with a plan for it. My libido is in the toilet bowl. I want to build more muscles. So one of my doctors were. Many of the doctors were like, you need. Your testosterone is like almost zero because of the birth control pills and being a midlife woman. So I was like, okay, bring it on. So I got the testosterone, I got the progesterone, and I'm basically doing a midlife science experiment on myself. And that's the way I describe it, because no one can do it for you. You have to do it for yourself. Obviously you have a doctor, you have a team of doctors to come up with the medical treatment plan, but you're the only one who can do the science experiment or experiment on yourself. You're the only one who can do the science experiment on yourself. You're the one who rubs the testosterone your inner thighs every morning. You're the one who takes the progesterone pill at night.

Sarah Milken 00:06:15  You're the one marking down your symptoms on a, you know, pad or whatever, and calling in and checking with the doctor. No one can do that for you. So until you're ready to embark on your own midlife menopause science experiment, nothing's getting done. Because no matter what doctor you go to, it could be the best doctor in the entire world. Everybody's body handles every single item differently. Some people need this much testosterone. Some people need that much testosterone. Some people can use regular testosterone from the regular pharmacy. Some people need the bioidentical testosterone from the compounding pharmacy. Some people take progesterone from the compounding pharmacy. Some people can take run of the mill progesterone from the regular pharmacy. And like for me, they gave me 100mg of regular progesterone to start. I literally felt like I got hit by a baseball bat the next day. And I have friends who are taking 203 hundred, and I couldn't even do 100. So that's my point. If you don't try it out under your doctor's treatment plan on yourself, you'll never know.

Sarah Milken 00:07:27  So I had that experience with 100mg for a couple of days. I called my doctor, she lowered it. She sent the prescription to a compounding pharmacy where they can do it in increments of 25. So she said, okay, start on the 25, do the 25 for a few days, then build up to the 50 again. Mid life science experiment on myself. I can't tell you how many DMs I got from women who were like, oh my God, thank you so much for talking about this. I have to find those DMs. It was like I finally took the estrogen out of my pantry. It's been sitting with my supplements for six months. Oh my God, I busted out the testosterone because I saw you putting it on your inner thigh. I probably traumatize my teenage children by showing that on Instagram, but the reason I showed it is because I want to show myself a normal, midlife, 49 year old woman doing the shit that all of us should, could, or would be doing.

Sarah Milken 00:08:26  It doesn't mean you have to do it. It doesn't mean it's the choice for you. The point is experimentation with things that we know work. It may not work for you, but you don't know until you meet with your doctor and you try things. So back to the DM. Again. Hi, Sarah. Question regarding your midlife science experiment. Did your doctor write a prescription for the testosterone? Yes she did. Is it bioidentical or compounded? I actually got a prescription for both. And I'm using the compound because I heard that it absorbs a little bit better. I don't know if that's myth or fact or whatever, but I'm just doing it, she wrote. It's so confusing what to ask for. I'm still trying to get educated myself. I was finally able to find a menopause specialist, and I finally had the HRT discussion, one that my former doctor wouldn't give me. I decided to start with the estrogen and progesterone first, although I did discuss wanting to use testosterone for low libido, but felt that there was some hesitation.

Sarah Milken 00:09:33  Thank you. And I won't read her name, but that's my point is she went to her for her original doctor. Her original doctor was like, Pooh poohed it. So she went and found someone else who would give her the answers that she wanted. That's called self-advocacy. And in midlife, actually, through all of life, we need to be our own advocates. There's no one sitting around waiting to rescue us, waiting to solve our medical problems other than my husband. Because he has me. So I'm like, here, do this. Oh, the blood test ladies coming to the house in five minutes like he locked out in that department because I do everything. But the average person who is not married to me has to take this on themselves. My kids. Oh my God, they're like, no more. No more blood tests. I'm like, yeah, that's what we're doing. Because I'm really sorry, but 20 year olds can have high cholesterol, which my kids, we'll talk about that in another episode.

Sarah Milken 00:10:27  But there are many adults guys. So to think so when people are like, oh, your kid's only 18 or 20, you can have medical stuff at 18 or 20. So don't forget to blood test your kids not scaring you, just giving you the info. back to the testosterone. So I've been taking the test using the testosterone on my inner thigh for a little over four weeks now. They said for me to get retested at six weeks and my pulling the clothing off of my husband. No. Do I feel a little bit stronger in the gym? Yes. Do I feel more aggressive, like some people complain about. No, my husband might have a different opinion. He told me I was being a little bitchy the other night, but he was chewing really loudly and biting his fork and it was driving me fucking bananas. So I don't know what's what. I do know that the testosterone is giving me more energy in terms of the progesterone. I'm still at the 25mg because it really is strong for me, but I do love the fact that it has the anxiety reducing component and it helps you with your sleep.

Sarah Milken 00:11:29  I don't absolutely have to be on the progesterone right now, because I'm not taking HRT, and I'm getting a different version of estrogen from my birth control pills. But when you do take HRT, the hormone replacement therapy, it is an absolute requirement that you take progesterone. So make sure you have that managed together because you absolutely need it. For me, because I'm taking the birth control pill instead, it's a slightly different scenario. Okay. let's find my next DM. Okay. The next DM I'm going to pray for you. She's talking about me being a half empty nester. I listened to all your podcasts and I get it. I know my time is coming. Luckily my youngest might stick around even though he plays football, so who knows. Thank you for listening. I love all your insight. I haven't gotten through all of your last podcast, but I'm so excited that you did the extended version this time I needed that. I'm just saying she's talking about the Kylie Kovach Rec episode that was three hours long.

Sarah Milken 00:12:35  So long. But I can't tell you how many people really loved it and appreciated it. I even got a message this morning that was like, oh my God. It was like I was listening to two friends talking and I'm going to read you that one next. I just remembered that one. and so this woman is talking about how her kid, she hasn't gone through emptiness yet, but she sees what I'm going through. So part of my point is, is not all of us will have experienced every single little thing that the others have experienced in midlife, but we're kind of putting all the information out there, all the emotions out there, to normalize it, because this woman will be there in a year or two, and she will watch my Instagram, listen to my podcast talking about how hard it is, and that makes her feel less alone and more normal. So that's part of the reason why I do this podcast, is to make people feel like they're more normal, that they're not alone in this, that midlife is a hard time.

Sarah Milken 00:13:34  We are having psychological and physical transitions. Okay, I'm finding one more thing before we wrap up. Okay. Hey girl. I've been listening to your podcast every Sunday when I drive back to the city from Long Island. And in case anyone hasn't told you recently how good and enjoyable they are on a two hour drive, I figured I should tell you I'm driving out early for Labor Day weekend now and thought, let me text her. She should know. Last one was with the woman whose parents were editors at Vogue. Right? That was Kylie Kovach. Anyway, I felt like I was sitting with girlfriends. So there you have it. Have a great weekend. I'm signing off and I'm not going. I'm actually going to put my full name here because there's two women that have the same name, and I always confuse the two. So anyway, my point is I respond to all of your DMs. I appreciate all of your honesty, your vulnerability. I know how hard it is. I know I'm the TMI version and I just put it all out there, but it's not as easy for everyone else to do.

Sarah Milken 00:14:38  So. I do appreciate all of your vulnerability and all of your messages and all the comments on my Instagram. If you look at my Instagram, my Instagram is a very involved community, and that's because people like you are taking the time to like, share, comment. And if you go into the comment section, there are real conversations happening there. It's not just like Hart, Hart, Hart, it's new people every single day joining this community and adding to the conversation. Midlife is. I started this platform four years ago now. Midlife is all the rage. When I started it, midlife was not all the rage. So I'm going to say that I'm a trendsetter. My kids are going to be like, no, you're not. And I'm going to say that I was one of the first ones to wear the weight of vest. Okay? And I just want to say thank you all for being here. We're going to evolve the show. We're going to keep it messy, keep it organic, keep adding new things.

Sarah Milken 00:15:37  Today was Dom's. Next time we're going to try to do some Collins. So if you're interested in that DM me. We'll have you call in, have you on the show. Get really up close and personal. Thanks for being here. Like share, follow, do all the things.