Experimenting with Midlife…Food, Supplements, Pickleball & Mocktails

Pamela 00:00:00  Why not? Like why not try it? Why wait anymore? Just like until you think you know enough. When I'm trying to make a big decision, don't look at something and overanalyze it. When instead I now look at something and say, this is an experiment, I'm going to see if this works. I am going to try it and then reevaluate.

Sarah 00:00:26  Hey peeps, welcome to the Flexible Neurotic Podcast. I'm your host, doctor Sarah Milken. Yeah, you heard that right. I'm a real PhD doctor. Long, long ago, like last fucking year, I was sitting in the midlife funk wondering, was this it for me? That day, I realized I needed to get off my ass and start my midlife remix. I dusted off my PhD, wiped the menopause sweat off my forehead, grabbed my golden shit shovel, and started digging deep to all my midlife bitches. It's not just luck, coffee and hormones that get you through your midlife remix. It's action steps. Let's do this. Hi, I'm doctor Sarah Millican.

Sarah 00:01:13  Welcome back to the Flexible Neurotic podcast, The Midlife Self Reinvention Podcast, where we talk about all the Uggs and fabulous cities of midlife. I have a very special guest today, longtime friend, I think I met her in college. I went to her 30th birthday like I've known her for a while. Fellow Penn grad awesome midlife her. She is a cooking instructor. Instagram phenomenon like social media mania. family favorite for the entire family and you'll know why. She is a two time best selling author. Cookbook author. What am I forgetting?

Pamela 00:01:55  That's good.

Sarah 00:01:55  Enough. Is it good enough? Yeah. Pamela Saltzman.

Pamela 00:01:58  Oh, thank you, my dear. Oh, my. Just just to be clear, though. When you met me, you were in college. I was not in college. Okay?

Sarah 00:02:05  Because you're so much older than me.

Pamela 00:02:06  So much like.

Sarah 00:02:07  Like, honestly, incrementally older. You made it past 50.

Pamela 00:02:12  This is true.

Sarah 00:02:13  I don't know how much further past 50, but I'm turning 50 this year.

Sarah 00:02:16  Like. Yeah. Yeah. Let's talk about I mean, today is basically when you said, what are we talking about? You know, I'm the worst cook in the world. We've talked about that for decades. And I'm like, we're not even going to talk about cooking. We're going to do like midlife, TMI, get into it. We're going to talk about Empty Nest. Great. We're going to talk about your sort of daily routine. like all of it. That list, the pickleball, the canasta, getting your brain turned on, finding the next thing in midlife, midlife friendship. So let's just start. Let's start with the fact that you already played pickleball today. I did. Yeah, I do start.

Pamela 00:02:56  I if I play pickleball, which I love, we can talk about it. I do start it early because I try and have a normal workday. It's like a discipline that I have. It's I have my own business. I don't teach that much in person anymore. I have a lot going on with the business.

Pamela 00:03:13  So I try and have like a normal day. So if people ask me to play at 11:00 in the morning, I'm like, no, sorry, I have to work. Yeah.

Sarah 00:03:20  Because then you get home and it's like half your day is done, correct?

Pamela 00:03:23  Got it correct.

Sarah 00:03:24  And the sun, I mean, like, it must be so hot later in the day.

Pamela 00:03:27  I mean, it's hot. I live at the beach. It's really not that hot compared to other places, so I'm completely fine with it. It's more that I need to. I just need to have a normal workday.

Sarah 00:03:39  Totally. Yeah. Okay. And tell us how you like how you started. I know you were on my pod. You were like, podcast episode two, I think. Yeah, that was like, it's still like one of the most popular shows because you're such a popular person with Everyone. but we had.

Pamela 00:03:55  A good kind of a good conversation.

Sarah 00:03:57  Yeah, that was an amazing conversation. So if people want to go back to that, like, they can definitely go back to that.

Sarah 00:04:02  I think it was episode two. but just give everyone like how you started, because I think so many listeners and Instagram followers are in this midlife space of like, what's next for me? And they've either started it or they're thinking about it now as empty nest approaches, or even if they don't have kids, it's like, what's next for me in this kind of mid zone of life?

Pamela 00:04:25  Listen, I was on a very traditional work path, okay? I got married and then I went to business school. I got pregnant when I was in business school. I graduated when I was six months pregnant. I fully expected to go back to, you know, one of these mega studios where I was working, and I decided to wait, just have the baby first, and then I got pregnant right away again. And so then I had two kids under two, and I didn't go back to work. And it was I mean, if you could have told me that I wasn't going to be working, like, I mean, I would have said you were crazy.

Pamela 00:05:02  So one of my life lessons is that sometimes plans don't work out. That doesn't mean that you did something wrong. It just means that they didn't work out the way you thought that they would. So that has been a life lesson for me. That said, after I had my third kid, then I thought to myself, okay, now it's time I'm done having children. I think I do want to go back to work in some capacity. I just didn't know what that was. I've always loved to cook and I. I was starting to be very interested in health wellness. I noticed a lot of people didn't eat well. I didn't realize so many people didn't cook at home. I just grew up that way. And so all these kind of ideas were happening in my head. And I was in a cooking group with a bunch of friends. We didn't really love the chef that much anymore. She didn't really teach us how to feed our families in as much as just kind of like chef Why foods and recipes.

Pamela 00:06:02  So they asked me to take it over and eventually they asked, you know, they kept asking me. I thought it was so ridiculous. Like, what did I know? I know, I mean, it's like imposter syndrome.

Sarah 00:06:10  You're like like, whoa.

Pamela 00:06:12  I like I thought maybe you needed to have, like, a cooking degree to teach cooking. Maybe you had to go to a good school. Like, how? What did I know? So I said to a friend of mine, she's just like, well, like, why not? Like, why not try it? Why not wait? Why wait anymore? Just like until you think you know enough. That was another good life lesson for me. So something that I think, I mean, I have tried to impart in my own business with myself when I'm trying to make a big decision, this has been helping me a lot, is don't look at something and overanalyze it and just say, you know, do you know enough? Should I pick A or B and then analyze it to death, when instead I now look at something and say, this is an experiment.

Pamela 00:07:04  I'm going to see if this works. I am going to try it and then reevaluate. And I'm really parlaying that into different aspects of my life, not just my business. And it's very effective for me because otherwise, and I think you just have to know what kind of person you are in terms of decision making and risk taking. And it has helped me because it just takes a little bit of the pressure off, like it's not a permanent decision. So I think how I can relate relay that to people who maybe are in midlife, who haven't had a career up until now, or maybe they're looking to pivot, is like, look at it like an experiment and just see what happens. And if it isn't perfect, which who cares if it is or it isn't? Then you make some tweaks. You make another pivot. I mean, do you think Apple was Apple when Apple started?

Sarah 00:07:59  I love that because I remember in our first conversation you were like, you have to be scared and do it anyway.

Sarah 00:08:05  And if you stay in rumination station, you can think of a thousand reasons of why not to do something. And I think if you take basically performance driven people like we, you know, we went to college, we checked boxes, we got gold stars, all of those things. So I think sometimes when you think of something as an experience and an experiment and it takes the outcome piece and the performance piece out of it, I think that that's helpful because you don't feel like, okay, I'm being graded, I'm being judged. Although I will say that with Instagram and social media, sometimes if you kind of get lost in the metrics of like how many likes did that get? How many plays did that that get? You can really get bogged down in the performance metrics part of it. But I think if you can look at it like you said, as more of like, I'm just going to try this.

Pamela 00:08:59  I mean, listen, let's not let's be clear, I do have a business though, so it's not like I'm just like, you know, throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks.

Sarah 00:09:10  So how many years have you been doing this now? Right.

Pamela 00:09:11  So I started out just being a cooking instructor one day a month. Right.

Sarah 00:09:16  Exactly. But, you know, it's like I just went out for Fisher.

Pamela 00:09:19  16 years.

Sarah 00:09:20  Ago doing this for 15 years. This is not okay. One day, two week four.

Pamela 00:09:25  The irony of this is that I am a planner, okay? And I went into this thinking it was going to just be this once a month thing that ended up blowing up. And I went to business school and got my MBA. I never had a business plan. I never had a five year plan. And if when I taught that first class, somebody had said to me, you know, you're going to have two books and you're going to have an online cooking platform and you're going to do sponsorship work, and you're going to have all these social media platforms, and you're going to try and do SEO on your website so that you could generate ad revenue. I'd be like, hell no, you can just stop me right now.

Pamela 00:10:07  Like, that sounds like a lot like there's no way that I can do that. And I didn't do it in a year. I did it over 16 years. So there is no race there. You know, it's very easy, like you said, to compare yourself to other people. But I gave up that game a long time ago. And in fact, my assistant actually just said this to me yesterday. She's like, you're really good at not comparing yourself to other people on social, just in terms of like, let me see what other people are doing and how come she's doing this? And how come she got this deal? And I'm like, it's a it's a really losing battle. So yes, that is something that I do not.

Sarah 00:10:52  Have you always been like that or it's as you're getting older, you're kind of reframing things and like what's your kind of trick and philosophy? Like how did you do it?

Pamela 00:11:02  Well,

Sarah 00:11:04  like, do you weigh yourself? Are you a numbers person?

Pamela 00:11:07  I had an moment several years ago.

Pamela 00:11:10  I can't remember how many years ago, but I remember it was after I had read an interview that somebody had interviewed me, and it was either it was like on a either a website or a magazine, and I was reading it at like 11:00 at night, and I was on my computer, and my husband was like asking me for the fifth time, when are you coming upstairs? Are you coming upstairs? Are you coming? I'm waiting. Are you coming?

Sarah 00:11:37  The lights are going out.

Pamela 00:11:38  Like is it? Are you done? I My.

Sarah 00:11:39  Retainers in.

Pamela 00:11:40  I mean, so I, I was reading this interview and it's the interview was like, what are your priorities? And my first priority was just like, you know, my health and my relationship with my husband and, you know, my family. And like, way down there was like work. And I'm like, this is such bullshit. I'm such a hypocrite. My first priority is I'm like, always working because when you have your own business, you can always work, always.

Pamela 00:12:09  You can always do more. And it's like always never enough. And so that's like that moment. I'm like that. That's it. I'm done, I am done, I am done just working as much as I possibly can. To what end. So at this point, could I work more? Absolutely. Could I have more Instagram followers if I worked more? Probably. Could I have, you know, more, impressions on my website if I worked even more. Probably true. Okay, but at what expense?

Sarah 00:12:47  And you spend a lot of time with your family. Your kids live all over the country? Yes, true. You're always in a different place. Like you would never be able to do all of those things.

Pamela 00:12:56  Right? So I'm trying at this point also trying to just like work smarter, not harder. But I'm also keeping my priorities in check. So after that moment, I gave myself a cutoff time stop working at the end of the day, make dinner for the family, have dinner with the family.

Pamela 00:13:20  You know, put one of them to bed who is still young, you know, do some whatever next time.

Sarah 00:13:26  Picky.

Pamela 00:13:27  Picky. Who's now 20.

Sarah 00:13:28  Terms I know I'm like teen son, teen daughter. Mr. picky, because your kid would need anything, right?

Pamela 00:13:33  He was so picky. He's not picky anymore.

Sarah 00:13:35  My son still does the vegetables. He's turning 20. I'm like, you can't live at one point. That's not.

Pamela 00:13:40  Normal. At one point it will click it. You know it'll it'll happen.

Sarah 00:13:44  But might get his nutrients checked. He's getting it from somewhere. I don't know what he's doing because he's still young.

Pamela 00:13:49  Yeah.

Sarah 00:13:49  I'm like, he just. I'm like, I make him do blood work. well.

Pamela 00:13:53  The funny thing about Mr. Picky is because people give me a really hard time about him saying, like, he's not picky because he eats like lentils.

Sarah 00:14:00  Yeah, and it's true, though, you know, mine would never.

Pamela 00:14:03  Yeah, he eats a lot of stuff.

Pamela 00:14:04  He just. There are things that he still doesn't eat because he doesn't. He chooses not to eat them like dairy. He doesn't think it's good for you and he doesn't.

Sarah 00:14:12  That's amazing. I wish I didn't eat dairy.

Pamela 00:14:14  It's fine. But, you know, sometimes it can be tricky since we all love cheese. So he won't.

Sarah 00:14:18  Just, like, let it slide. No no no.

Pamela 00:14:22  No. And he doesn't eat any pork or meat or poultry. I know my.

Sarah 00:14:26  My daughter is like a pork freak. She's like, does that bolognaise have pork in it? And I'm like, dude, chill. Like, what you don't know can't kill Yo.

Pamela 00:14:35  Well, he can like sniff it out. So that said, I respect his choices, but.

Sarah 00:14:41  He's not cooking. You are correct.

Pamela 00:14:43  He lives in college anyway, so. But but people have said to me he's like, they're like, he's not picky. You know, somebody who eats anchovies and sardines and lentils and, you know, all these vegetables is not picky.

Pamela 00:14:54  And so I did say that to my son. I'm like, you know, people are like calling you out on the fact that you're not picky. I said this in a couple years ago. He's like, mom, it's my brand. Like we stick with it.

Sarah 00:15:06  That's so funny, I love it. Well, I posted a photo of my daughter from her Europe trip two days ago, and she messages me and she's like, what the fuck? What? The photo? And I go, Marin, like, I have to post you once in a while, like you're part of the story. And then I started getting all these messages like, she's so pretty. She has amazing eyebrows. Who does her eyebrows? And I'm like, she does her own eyebrows. Oh, she should start an eyebrow business. So I'm like, screenshotting all of it. And sending it to her, and now she's like, okay with it, you know what I mean? But I'm like, dude, I'm like, it's so on brand for you to be a pain in my ass.

Sarah 00:15:41  Yeah. But then as soon as everyone was all over the eyebrows, then it was like, oh. And now, like, everyone on the trip wants her to do their eyebrows. It's like a whole thing. I'm like, knock yourself out. Amazing. Knock yourself out. now, in terms of empty nest, yeah, you have three kids. They're all out of the house.

Pamela 00:16:02  Yes. So I have one who lives, in Dallas. She works. I have another one who lives in the New York City area. She also works. And then my son is a sophomore, actually, he's going to be a junior in college, so. And he goes to school in Pennsylvania. So yes, they are all over the place. I don't love that.

Sarah 00:16:23  Yeah.

Pamela 00:16:24  but I do have a flexible schedule and a flexible boss lol. It's me, So I have been.

Sarah 00:16:32  Has flexibility to with his job.

Pamela 00:16:34  Correct. Because he has his own business too. So we do get to visit them.

Pamela 00:16:37  And one thing that I think is fantastic that came out of the pandemic, the like, the only thing is that a lot of companies, I have a little bit of flexibility now in terms of if one of my kids says, like, hey, can I work remotely from my parent's house for a week? They usually say yes, and then the kids aren't required to take vacation time. So that has been a nice thing. So they I do see them more, I think, than I probably would have.

Sarah 00:17:06  Did you think they were not going to end up in LA?

Pamela 00:17:09  I mean it was. Yeah. I mean one they both would love to come back here, but now they're just kind of like California is kind of a shit show. Yeah. No. And like, what am I doing, my son?

Sarah 00:17:20  You're going to New York. Yeah. He's like, I'm not coming back to L.A. like I'm in New York. I'm like, okay.

Pamela 00:17:26  Yeah, they both love to be here, but they're just like, yeah, your taxes kind of suck.

Sarah 00:17:31  I love it now. Yeah, yeah.

Pamela 00:17:32  Yeah, right.

Sarah 00:17:33  But when they were buying shit as kids, it's like anything goes, baby.

Pamela 00:17:37  Yeah. And then my son like, who knows it. We'll see. But they. Yes, they're all over the place. So I've been an empty nester for two solid years. It's pretty great. other than the fact that my kids are all over the place and I don't get to see them as much as I would like to, but I, I, I am comfortable with the empty nest. Okay? The kids are solid. If they were floundering, I might not be as as cool with it if my kid and like, I love being all together. But on the other hand, I also value their being independent and doing what they're supposed to be doing at this phase of their lives if they were home and maybe, you know, without a goal in life and struggling in that way. I probably wouldn't be loving that. So I'm happy that they're independent human beings and being solid citizens and contributing to society, and they're good people, so I'm very happy about that.

Pamela 00:18:48  My husband and I both still work. We both have our own businesses, and now we're also trying to find things to do together.

Sarah 00:18:58  So hard.

Pamela 00:18:59  It did not exist. Yeah, it is a struggle. Okay.

Sarah 00:19:02  You guys like, play pickleball together, correct. My husband and I could never like. I mean, I don't know where you and Daniel stand on your athletic abilities, but Jeremy played college baseball. There's no scenario where I'm playing pickleball or golf or tennis with him. He's like a psychopath. It's a.

Pamela 00:19:19  Personality thing. So. So you may not be able to play pickleball with Jeremy and survive that I am.

Sarah 00:19:30  You can't even share a closet. Yeah.

Pamela 00:19:32  So Daniel and I do play pickleball pretty well together, but, like, if he hits an easy shot out, I apparently have some facial expressions that I'm not aware of. Right? And he's like, what? I'm like, I didn't say anything. He's like, no, you're look, I'm like, I didn't have a look.

Pamela 00:19:50  He's like, I just saw it. I'm like, I totally did not have a look. And then if I hit something out, he goes, see? It happens. I'm like, what are you talking about?

Sarah 00:19:59  Oh my God, no. See. But like, we're I mean, I don't know if he plays down for you or you play up for him or whatever, but like for us it's it would be like, I can't even think of an analogy. It's like spazzing professional. Okay.

Pamela 00:20:12  But here's what I want to tell you. That is good about pickleball, which is what I always say, which is that when you play, you do rotate partners. So you're usually you play for an hour and a half, you play six games and you rotate partners after two games. So you're really only going to be playing with your husband for two games out of the six. And so that's where.

Sarah 00:20:30  Then are you? You're but you sometimes you have them on your team and sometimes you're playing against him.

Sarah 00:20:34  I couldn't even hit a ball to Jeremy.

Pamela 00:20:37  Well, then then maybe you need to take some lessons. Yeah.

Sarah 00:20:39  Okay. I'm like, you play with him and let.

Pamela 00:20:41  Me know.

Sarah 00:20:42  How that goes.

Pamela 00:20:43  So yeah, because we will often play now with other couples and it's, it is important to, to find couples that are sort of at your level. Right, right. I mean, it is harder because men are generally going to be a little bit I'm not going to say better.

Sarah 00:20:58  You're saying stronger.

Pamela 00:21:00  Maybe they.

Sarah 00:21:00  Hit harder.

Pamela 00:21:01  Yeah. So so we are doing that together. We are taking walks together after dinner. If we don't have dinner plans with with other people. In fact, we are also now starting to work out together.

Sarah 00:21:13  I saw that on your Instagram.

Pamela 00:21:15  We are.

Sarah 00:21:16  Sweaty Betty. Yes, yes, we're.

Pamela 00:21:19  And you know what I have to say? Like it's easier than trying to make a plan with a girlfriend to come over and work out with me at home, and we can motivate each other a little bit more, you know? So that is actually working out really well for us so that we're doing together.

Sarah 00:21:36  That he it's okay for now. We have to practice with it a little bit more because he's doesn't like the AC on. I like the AC on. You know we have like a few little kinks that we have to get through.

Pamela 00:21:47  Well we are not just free for me like we are doing videos like on YouTube. That is so that like we have a there's a structure.

Sarah 00:21:57  Yeah, there's.

Pamela 00:21:57  Structure to it. We're not just like in the gym. No. We go, we have a little home gym and we're doing these videos and they're we really like them. So we're doing that a couple times a week together and I am I also just picked up do you have that.

Sarah 00:22:11  Post exercise sex like.

Pamela 00:22:13  Do not.

Sarah 00:22:14  It's not like this whole like no sexy scene.

Pamela 00:22:18  No I like.

Sarah 00:22:19  That's just for the movies.

Pamela 00:22:20  Yes. Yeah. It likes to be really dark. Yeah. Nothing after. No. And plus, what.

Sarah 00:22:27  Happened in movies nobody wants to have sex with, like, a sweaty person.

Sarah 00:22:31  Like, it's just nasty. Like that's all real. I mean, maybe if I was, like, loaded up on testosterone or something.

Pamela 00:22:37  Yeah.

Sarah 00:22:37  My legs. Yeah, it's a whole thing. Yeah.

Pamela 00:22:40  No, no, this never happening. And then I need to, like, start my workday.

Sarah 00:22:44  Yeah. And you're like. And goodbye.

Pamela 00:22:45  And goodbye. Yeah. Correct.

Sarah 00:22:47  Oh my God.

Pamela 00:22:47  So,

Sarah 00:22:49  Okay. Canasta.

Pamela 00:22:49  Canasta. So I just picked up canasta and a.

Sarah 00:22:52  Couple in a nursing home. And you're not.

Pamela 00:22:54  A couple of my friends are getting their husbands to play canasta, too.

Sarah 00:22:58  Yeah, interesting, I know. Okay, so.

Pamela 00:23:00  Jeremy's whole.

Sarah 00:23:01  Family, they're all card players.

Pamela 00:23:03  It's good for your brain. I know it is.

Sarah 00:23:04  Jeremy's. My grandmother played till she was 99. She passed away last year. She did, and she was 100% lucid.

Pamela 00:23:11  Of course she did.

Sarah 00:23:12  Bridge, canasta. So I'm like also Sarah. Yes.

Pamela 00:23:16  Racquet sports.

Pamela 00:23:17  Very good for the brain.

Sarah 00:23:18  I hear that, but I'm a little spastic.

Pamela 00:23:20  Part of the reason that I'm also doing these things is not just for the compatibility with my husband and, you.

Sarah 00:23:29  Know, and the social and the social plus.

Pamela 00:23:33  Like, here's what I did find when I became a new, empty nester is we started going out too much with, like, meals, like everything, every plan became a meal. Totally. We'll meet you guys for drinks. We'll meet you guys for dinner. And then.

Sarah 00:23:49  You've had 5000 extra calories that you wouldn't have.

Pamela 00:23:51  Normally. I gained weight immediately. It's like way more alcohol. Way more food. Like you're just eating so much more than you would at home. And then I'm like, okay, we gotta stop this. Like we have to figure out. And that was one of my very first newsletters on my Substack was like, how can we be social without food?

Sarah 00:24:09  I find the same thing with teenagers, too, because I'll tell you, like, my daughter and her friends are like going for matcha and dinners and lunches and all this stuff.

Sarah 00:24:17  But the boy, my son, when he was a slightly younger, they weren't doing that as much. It was more. And it was also playing video games. But it wasn't like so much like everything is a five course meal or matcha or frozen yogurt. It was like, I mean, they obviously they're playing sports too, but still so much as food based. Like, my husband and I just got back from two weeks of New York and Miami, I was like, I can't eat one more piece of food. I'm like, I'm. Both of us were like in a food coma. I'm like, I just want some fucking cottage cheese. Don't give me like 17 pieces of a meal. And then the bread basket. It's like too many things. Too many.

Pamela 00:24:55  Things. I find that, like, now I, I, I'm having to adjust because unlike you, I am actually in menopause. So I think.

Sarah 00:25:03  Birth control pills, if I stop taking them I would be like game over.

Sarah 00:25:07  It's like all fake and that's coming soon. Like I am like.

Pamela 00:25:11  I'm just telling you the writing on the wall. So I, I now if I am going out to dinner with other people, I generally am not eating three full meals that day. It's just I can't do it anymore. So I might have like something very small for breakfast kind of late. Scooch my lunch up a bit, have like a normal lunch, and then, you know, go out to dinner. So that's just kind of one adjustment that I've had. And do you.

Sarah 00:25:40  Do you intermittent fast I can't remember.

Pamela 00:25:42  Not really. I mean, it depends on.

Sarah 00:25:43  I know you've been on both side. Like do you do that like 16 hours. No no no no no no.

Pamela 00:25:48  So for me because I, I have been experimenting a ton with so many.

Sarah 00:25:53  And I know you wore glucose monitor for a while.

Pamela 00:25:55  I'll try that.

Sarah 00:25:56  I need to do that. We have two weeks. Yeah.

Pamela 00:25:57  Tell me.

Pamela 00:25:58  Yeah, yeah yeah I try that for two weeks. So I've been trying a lot of things post, you know, like in this menopause era that I'm in and seeing what works for me because I really believe that like everybody is different. I am not good at a long fast. So for me, the sweet spot is like a 14 hour fast finish eating by 7 p.m..

Sarah 00:26:23  Which is hard if you're going out to, which is hard if you're going.

Pamela 00:26:26  Out unless you have other friends I.

Sarah 00:26:28  Know. Tomorrow I have a dinner to eat and we're going, I think, to the Bel-Air hotel for a birthday. It's like at 530. I'm like, love. Sign me up, love. Yeah. Early bird.

Pamela 00:26:38  Special. One of my friends. We were. I made a reservation. A bunch of us were going out. I made the reservation for 630. Okay, 630 for me.

Sarah 00:26:46  Now, you were a nerd.

Pamela 00:26:47  Yeah. She's like, okay, geriatric hour.

Sarah 00:26:50  But that's what my daughter says to me because she, you know, she's the one who likes to cook.

Sarah 00:26:53  She starts cooking in like 715.

Pamela 00:26:56  Impossible.

Sarah 00:26:56  And my husband's, like, already eaten six meals before, like, he comes home from work, he eats the whole pantry and he's waiting. And she he's like, I can't do this. I'm eating for six hours at night.

Pamela 00:27:06  I do have several friends, though, that really like to eat early, and I'm so down with it. Okay, if somebody wants to eat with me at 5:00. I'm there 530. Great. 6:00. Amazing. 630. Okay, I'll do it. I know, but I.

Sarah 00:27:21  Love you 30 years. But, like, by the time you like. Sit down, you get your water, you're ordering like it's a late meal, and then you throw an alcohol onto that. It's like, game over.

Pamela 00:27:31  No, my aura ring will tell me. Pamela, you do not do well with late meal.

Sarah 00:27:36  Is your aura ring like your bitch? Like is she or you're the aura rings, bitch. Actually, your aura rings like yelling at you all day.

Pamela 00:27:45  So don't make fun of my aura. Ring my. You know, the only good information. Okay?

Sarah 00:27:48  The only reason I don't wear one. I think I've told you this is I feel like I would become obsessed.

Pamela 00:27:54  Yes, people do say that. That would be me.

Sarah 00:27:56  In fact, my son wears a hoop band. Yeah, and because he's in his, like, you know that, you know, when you, like, drink for weeks and weeks and then you're like, oh, shit. I, like, have to pull myself back together. He's in like the pull yourself back.

Pamela 00:28:09  I don't know that, but I know that there are people like.

Sarah 00:28:11  Yeah, because he, he was not a he did not even have alcohol in high school. But then he got to school and it's like fraternity scene, the whole thing. It was like everything had to change. But right now he's in the internship, I run before work and I'm at my internship at eight. It's like, so weird seeing him like in that mode.

Pamela 00:28:30  But I'm just going to tell you the aura ring, and I'm not. I'm not sponsored by aura at all. I wish I were sure they like to sponsor me. I'm completely open to that. But, but I will say it just it gives you information, right? I thought that I was a terrible sleeper, and aura has shown me I'm not a terrible sleeper. I'm not as bad as I thought I was. But it also proves to me time and time again, alcohol, crushes.

Sarah 00:28:59  Crushes.

Pamela 00:29:00  My sleep, my deep sleep, and my REM just destroys it. We were just.

Sarah 00:29:04  In Miami and we went out with this couple twice and they're like, you guys don't drink. And I'm like, you don't understand. If I drink alcohol, I cannot sleep. And for me, it's not worth it. To me, not worth it. It's not worth the whole thing. I'm like.

Pamela 00:29:20  Screws it all up. I can't do it. Here's where I land on alcohol. Okay, first of all, I used to drink quite a bit when I was a lot younger.

Pamela 00:29:26  And then you could also burn.

Sarah 00:29:28  Burn it better, more easily. Like, you know what I mean? You're not fighting.

Pamela 00:29:32  listen, Sarah, let's just be honest about alcohol for a minute. There's no no benefit.

Sarah 00:29:37  Not one benefit, not.

Pamela 00:29:38  There are no benefits to alcohol, okay? It is a toxin. Should you. Am I saying to give it up entirely? No. There's plenty of toxins out there, okay. That we all, you know, are exposed to. We consume whatever. So moderation is definitely the key. But even moderation, they're saying not so great. They're it's just indisputable. It's not great for you. You know. That said, I think that if I wanted to have one drink every couple of weeks, like, fine, totally fine with that. I'm totally fine with.

Sarah 00:30:08  Like, having 12 gummy bears.

Pamela 00:30:09  I got to this point where I was like, okay, I can have a drink if I have electrolytes before it, electrolytes after it.

Pamela 00:30:18  I have two glasses of water for my cocktail. It has to be before that's a science experiment. And I'm like, what is this? What is this? This isn't good for me. What am I why am I fighting this?

Sarah 00:30:31  And it's not like you have social anxiety and you need the alcohol to, like, get you in the moment. That's what's so dumb about it.

Pamela 00:30:38  Mocktail right now.

Sarah 00:30:39  Yeah. I've seen. Tell me your favorite mocktail and how you make it low sugar. Because when I think mocktail, I think like syrup. It's like juice. Yeah, just.

Pamela 00:30:47  Like juice and sparkling water. Like, that's not a.

Sarah 00:30:49  Cola and whatever.

Pamela 00:30:51  No. Okay. Number one has to be in a fun glass, okay? And then you feel like you're kind of.

Sarah 00:30:56  On vacation, eat like.

Pamela 00:30:58  You're having fun, and it's festive like everybody else. Okay? You're not, like, in a water glass. Number two, Who it needs to just sort of taste a little bit more than just like juice.

Pamela 00:31:10  So my very favorite one is so good. All my friends love it. Are you ready? Okay. You take jalapeno like a slice or two. You muddle it in a rimmed.

Sarah 00:31:22  What is clang.

Pamela 00:31:23  So you just take either a muddler like a wooden kind of.

Sarah 00:31:26  Oh, it's a cooking word. That's why I don't know it. I don't know it.

Pamela 00:31:29  It's like a bartending word. Okay. So you take so I'll take, like the end of a wooden spoon. You just kind of smash the jalapenos.

Sarah 00:31:36  Slice the jalapeno like. Like a slice. Like the green thing.

Pamela 00:31:40  Would you stop it a jalapeno? Yes. It's the green pepper okay. But I've never bought one.

Sarah 00:31:45  See. Okay.

Pamela 00:31:46  All right. So you put it in the bottom of like a rimmed glass. So I'll rim the glass with like, tahini or something fun like that okay. You smush it up a little bit, you add in some ice and then you pour in. I like to do two parts grapefruit juice and one part lime juice and then a little sweetener to taste like stevia.

Pamela 00:32:09  Pour some sparkling water over it. I'm telling you, you feel like you're drinking a Paloma or a spicy bar.

Sarah 00:32:17  Or practice set.

Pamela 00:32:18  Yes. It's fun. It's delicious. And I mean, there are some mocktail brands out there that I think are good, but to your point, they're just loaded with sugar.

Sarah 00:32:30  There's no point. You might as well eat a fucking donut.

Pamela 00:32:32  If I had to eat sugar, yeah, I might as well wait for a brownie.

Sarah 00:32:36  I'm eating a donut or doing a. Correct? Yeah, correct.

Pamela 00:32:39  That said, I also will take a splash of something like an amaro, which definitely is alcohol, but is that so? It's an Italian liquor. It's a it's a class of Italian liquors like Aperol. Oh, right. Sorry. That. there's a good one that's locally made. Amaro. Angelino. Beautiful. Amaro. Nono. My favorite. So even if maybe you just want, like, a little splash of some bitters to throw in there. Like, that's fun too.

Pamela 00:33:06  And then you're not drinking like an entire full blown cocktail, which is really my approach to so many things these days and how I'm like teaching people in terms of cooking, because LA people, I love all my L.A. cooking class students, but sometimes they can get a little black and white. You know, it has to be like full vegan, full keto. Got it. You know, I have to go all gluten free. They don't know why, but, you know, so I'm like, you don't you don't have to be so black and white. Yeah. You got to like.

Sarah 00:33:36  Chalk it up a little bit.

Pamela 00:33:38  Yeah. Okay. So you can if you don't really want to drink at all, fine. Don't drink at all. But like a little splash of an amaro, which, you know, is a little something.

Sarah 00:33:47  It's like Mr. Picky, not like just eating the dairy that happens to be in the pasta sauce. It's like, come on.

Pamela 00:33:53  Or, you know, have a little pasta, but just zhuzh it up with like a ton of vegetables or do half zoodles and half.

Sarah 00:34:00  That's how we were the same. Like I'm like the in the middle. Good enough. Like I'm on a trip with my husband. We're eating. We had gelato twice. I'm eating the fucking gelato 100%. Like, duh, duh. Like, I'm not doing this, like, extreme. No, extreme doesn't work. It's so. And it's.

Pamela 00:34:17  Attainable.

Sarah 00:34:18  Not fun, not fun. Live your.

Pamela 00:34:20  Life. Yeah.

Sarah 00:34:21  No no no no, I'm not doing that. Well, I'm glad you have the mocktail thing down. Now I'm going to have to, like, lay that out in the show notes. Like Pamela's recipe for mocktails.

Pamela 00:34:29  I've got a couple on my site too, so people can check them out. There's one that's hibiscus tea. Like iced tea, biscuits, tea. There's one with, like, ginger juice.

Sarah 00:34:37  Daniel's favorite.

Pamela 00:34:38  Well, he drinks.

Sarah 00:34:39  Oh, he drinks real. Yeah.

Pamela 00:34:41  Well, the funny thing is about my husband is that his parents don't drink at all.

Pamela 00:34:45  My parents are Italian. My parents drank wine every night with dinners.

Sarah 00:34:49  I've never even don't even drink alcohol.

Pamela 00:34:50  Yeah, so my in-laws don't drink. So. So we had this, like, intersection. So my husband never drank, never drank, never drank, and I was drinking, drinking, drinking. And then at some point he's like, I feel like I'm missing out on something. And I'm like, I'm done. So when when I should be.

Sarah 00:35:07  Drunk playing pickleball, when I stopped.

Pamela 00:35:10  Drinking, he started drinking. And it's funny, it's actually okay because like, then there's always a designated driver, right?

Sarah 00:35:16  Right, right.

Pamela 00:35:16  He is really into like mid-century cocktails, tiki cocktails, which are so gross. He's not going to listen to this interview. Okay. But tiki cocktails are like the grossest. They're super sweet. You have the worst hangover. They're always.

Sarah 00:35:34  Like, doing that because he likes.

Pamela 00:35:35  Them and he's so into that whole era.

Sarah 00:35:38  So does he put on costumes with it.

Pamela 00:35:41  Like you're laughing, but he has so many tiki shirts. Okay, I had to throw him a tiki birthday party a couple of years ago, and I was like, this is my worst nightmare.

Sarah 00:35:51  Like a fucking Harry Potter scene. It's like a little weird.

Pamela 00:35:55  It's my worst nightmare. Oh my God. But he's super into it. Okay, you have to.

Sarah 00:36:00  He acted like little Hobbit.

Pamela 00:36:02  Actually has, like, a whole tiki Instagram account also. And there's this whole other world that we don't know about that you and I know about it because he's in it of like this.

Sarah 00:36:17  It's like Harry Potter for midlife. It's not.

Pamela 00:36:21  But it's like this whole tiki situation.

Sarah 00:36:24  What is he he mean? I'm thinking.

Pamela 00:36:26  Like a.

Sarah 00:36:27  Fire. People in Hawaii.

Pamela 00:36:29  Yes, yes. And there's like this art and there's these mugs and they're on a bra or something. Actually, it's funny that you said that we did go to Tahiti for our honeymoon, but that's not Tiki, so. Well, actually, that's not that's actually French Polynesia is kind of tiki, but like, Hawaii has tiki elements to it.

Pamela 00:36:48  But like, there is this tiki, kind of movement right now. It's very popular. So the tiki bars are opening up everywhere. So for his birthday this year, I had to go to a tiki bar in West Hollywood. It's my tale of the pup. I forgot what it's called. I have to say they did a really good job with it, but I like it's so not my aesthetic. I mean, look what I'm dressed like, I. I wear one color. It's in a neutral tone. He's got like, these Hawaiian like, tiki shirts.

Sarah 00:37:15  I see the shirts on the Instagram, but I didn't know if that was just part of like that. You live in Manhattan Beach?

Pamela 00:37:20  No, no.

Sarah 00:37:21  No, no, it's part of.

Pamela 00:37:23  The yes. And he's so into like this whole mid-century thing.

Sarah 00:37:26  Or he's like the Lone Ranger.

Pamela 00:37:28  He has a couple of friends. Yeah, that do it. They'll go to like the are.

Sarah 00:37:31  They new.

Pamela 00:37:32  Friends know this. They'll go to like this Tiki conference.

Pamela 00:37:35  It's not a conference. What is it called? Not Tiki Kon, but like Tiki Oasis. Oh my god. And all the tiki people get together in San Diego or wherever it is I know. Well, you know, we have a house in the desert. It's like tiki land over there. Yeah, we got to move on from this, but but I love it. I'm trying to be supportive, but just don't drag me to it.

Sarah 00:37:55  Well, it's like my husband was golf, like he never played golf, and now he's become like a golf lunatic. And I'm like, where the fuck did this come from? And it's like, all these, like, special outfits are coming in the shoes. And do you like this hat? And it's like the sandwiching of where the hats the same color as, like the shoes.

Pamela 00:38:11  Like, listen, I respect that. And I'm like, everybody needs to.

Sarah 00:38:14  Have.

Pamela 00:38:15  Their things that are really interesting to them and I so I totally respect.

Sarah 00:38:20  The piano. We've talked about it, but.

Pamela 00:38:21  I love that. That's amazing.

Sarah 00:38:24  It's better than like porn and gambling.

Pamela 00:38:26  Correct? Tiki, you say that.

Sarah 00:38:28  Tiki is better than.

Pamela 00:38:29  In a sense.

Sarah 00:38:30  You know, having affairs and it's like talking.

Pamela 00:38:33  Fine.

Sarah 00:38:33  Totally good.

Pamela 00:38:34  Just don't drag me into it. Yeah, I told you, I'm not interested. But I love that you have something. Yeah.

Sarah 00:38:40  You're not wearing, like, a costume, right? I love it now. How I had.

Pamela 00:38:44  To wear this costume.

Sarah 00:38:45  Oh. You have? Yes. That's not good.

Pamela 00:38:47  Once.

Sarah 00:38:48  Okay, but would you say that in this time in your life, like in mid-life, like, have you changed your ideas about friendships? Have you added new friends, or are you have you done friend audits? Are you wanting to kind of hang with your old people, bring in new people like what's your what's your vibrant now?

Pamela 00:39:10  I mean, I, I still have a lot of the same friends that I've had, even when I moved up to Manhattan Beach, the the same friends that I've had in LA for, you know, 30 years, 20 whatever years.

Pamela 00:39:22  And I, I, I have new friends too. Here's what I'm just going to say in general about midlife as it relates to pretty much anything. And this is also true about friends. It's never too late to do anything. It's never too late to learn something. It's never too late to make new friends. I hate when people say like, I don't have time for new friends, or it's kind of late to have make new friends. That is ridiculous. That is ridiculous. We have so many years ahead of us, and people bring different things to the table right now. I do tend to hang out with people more who like to do the same kind of things that I do, so I'm not really hanging out as much with people that are like doing psychedelics and like partying and, that kind of thing. I'm, I'm hanging out with a lot of people that are wanting to be active. I, I'm very social, like we've talked about with pickle canasta and people that my husband and I both like, you know, I, my friends have stayed pretty consistent, but I have met some new people, especially from, you know, pickle and such.

Pamela 00:40:40  And and I think that is a that can't be anything but a good thing. Right? I think community as you get older, it becomes more and more important.

Sarah 00:40:48  Community sometimes as as like you said, the couples part of it too, because sometimes, like, it's easier for you to go and play pickleball with couples if you like both the husband and the wife or the both spouses or whatever. Right? I think that makes it all the better and more fun. Like, we were just in Miami and we were with this couple, and it was funny because I didn't know them that well. And the woman is maybe four years younger than me, and she's like, do you wake surf? And I was like, what the fuck? What? And Jeremy's like laughing hysterically. He's like, this bitch doesn't even get her hair wet. Like, you know what I mean? Like, what are you talking about? And then, you know, she's telling me that, like, she and her whole friend group her, like, literally within my age range.

Sarah 00:41:33  Like, they go wake surfing every week in Miami, like, once or twice a week, like you're doing pickleball and canasta, and I'm like, wake surfing. Like, it's so interesting the things that people pick up on. And then we were at a restaurant and we ran into one of her friends and she's like, do you wait? Serve? Like what? What it's like.

Pamela 00:41:51  That's a community.

Sarah 00:41:52  That's what I'm saying. It's so interesting. Like how different cities in different people have their own, like, little things. And like, although my husband plays tennis, he's played pickleball, blah, blah, blah. He's never played padel, right? But pickleball, I guess in Miami is not like a huge thing. Pick up paddle or you call paddle or paddle is like the huge thing there. It's like all the rage. Right? So the guy, the husband took Jeremy to play paddle, paddle. And Jeremy was like, oh my God, I fucking love this. And I thought, oh my God, there's gonna be like another like sport.

Sarah 00:42:27  But why not know for sure? Of course he came home like looked up. There's like one place in LA, right? It's not here miles away. It's not here yet. But I'm like, that's your Miami activity. Great. Have a good time with that.

Pamela 00:42:38  Let me just say though, the the thing I'll be wake surfing. I would love to see that I want video.

Sarah 00:42:44  I know to prove that. Yeah, I know, me too.

Pamela 00:42:46  The one thing that I do struggle with in terms of my social life is finding the time to keep up with people, and making plans like making plans is actually work 100%. So sometimes I don't find like I have that kind of time.

Sarah 00:43:05  So it has to be intentional and you have to create it. Yeah. And you have to like keep at it. It's not like it's going to be dropped on your lap. Yeah. I mean it's I know emails, it's texts.

Pamela 00:43:15  It's looking at.

Sarah 00:43:16  Dinner reservation.

Pamela 00:43:17  Dinner reservations like and I'm not complaining.

Pamela 00:43:20  I'm just saying like I do find that I get like I'm busy during the day and I'm trying to work and like the whole thing and doing other things. So I'm sometimes I'm kind of like, oh, wow, it's Thursday night. We actually don't have plans. How did that happen? And that's okay. We don't want to go out every single night like at all.

Sarah 00:43:39  But but do you have certain nights of the week that you do, like couples? Like go out there? No, I don't.

Pamela 00:43:44  Have, like, a schedule. It's not like.

Sarah 00:43:45  Thursdays and Saturdays or.

Pamela 00:43:47  No, we don't really have a schedule. I mean.

Sarah 00:43:49  But you're a big restaurant person, so you don't don't you book, like, set like, there's some restaurants you've, like, booked for months in advance?

Pamela 00:43:55  No, I'm not like that at all. I'm not that organized. That's that's my point. I'm not that organized about it. I do entertain at home a lot. That was just my biggest nightmare.

Pamela 00:44:02  So we have. Well, yeah, but we have people come over, like at least every other week and in the summer, very often, once I'm like, I'll.

Sarah 00:44:11  Meet you at a restaurant.

Pamela 00:44:12  And I like going out to restaurants too, but I just I think it's more fun. Yeah, to be honest, because you're.

Sarah 00:44:17  Good at it.

Pamela 00:44:18  Yeah. Listen, the food's always going to be better at a restaurant, like, especially the restaurants we have now. I got it, but I don't care because it's not really about that. I just want to relax.

Sarah 00:44:28  Yeah. And then your husband's doing the tikis and. Yeah.

Pamela 00:44:31  No he does.

Sarah 00:44:32  Does anyone else do people just appease him or.

Pamela 00:44:34  Yeah, he makes some kind of batch cocktail and then people are feel obligated to try it. I mean very often they're good, sometimes they're a mess, but that's okay. I've got a mocktail on the side for anybody that needs it I love that.

Sarah 00:44:50  Oh my God I love that okay.

Sarah 00:44:52  Now in terms of like your health routine like obviously you're a big influencer in the health space. What have you found in the last five years that you feel like are your go tos must haves? You're doing this. You're sticking to it.

Pamela 00:45:10  Okay. Yeah. okay. Now, I have had to make a lot of I had to I had to do a lot of experimenting after menopause. It's the menopause changes the game changes the game.

Sarah 00:45:23  And how long have you been post periods?

Pamela 00:45:26  this was I don't even remember at this point. 2020 maybe. Was I, maybe I started 2021. So maybe I'm three years into it. But it has been dramatic. Okay. So do you take.

Sarah 00:45:40  Do you take hormones? No. Okay.

Pamela 00:45:43  So. And I'm not opposed to that. I'm just not a candidate. So I gained a bit of weight. I'm like. It'll come off. Not. Not so much, not so quickly. And I'm. I might have to work at it a little bit.

Pamela 00:45:55  So here's what I'm going to say. weights, strength training a must. Oh, I'm.

Sarah 00:46:03  New to it. Yep. I'm new.

Pamela 00:46:04  To it. It's a must, ladies. Just get in there. Don't let anybody discourage you and tell you you have to do a certain number of weights, and you have to do it to failure. And you. And it's like, so intimidating. Just find a YouTube video, start with something low you build up later.

Sarah 00:46:24  Just choose the video thing that you like.

Pamela 00:46:26  I do, I do. Oh you do a few of that.

Sarah 00:46:27  I thought there was one specific.

Pamela 00:46:29  One that I we tend to go to more because she has a good range of them. Her name's like growing growing on us or something like that on us. Like, growing like a and a and and.

Sarah 00:46:45  Whatever she has on there, Daniel can do to just his way.

Pamela 00:46:48  We just do it with different size weights. Right. Okay. You know, the reason I like her and I actually tagged her once and she laughed because I wrote, I like that she doesn't talk.

Pamela 00:46:56  Oh, like I like people that do. I don't want to hear you talk.

Sarah 00:47:00  Like my pellets. My treadmills are peloton. I'm like, dude, don't speak.

Pamela 00:47:04  Do not, do not, do not. I don't want to hear you say, good job.

Speaker UU 00:47:07  Yeah. One more. What's your vibe today? I'm like, I don't have a fucking vibe. I want this to be over.

Pamela 00:47:12  Yeah. Stop talking. I don't want to hear your voice like so. That. Shut the fuck up. I can't believe I said that. I'm not a cursor like you. It's okay. You're rubbing off on me. So I like that about I think it.

Sarah 00:47:24  You just don't say it. I'm just the Tourette's version. Yes, I know.

Pamela 00:47:28  And then she has, like, a little countdown on her videos. Like you're 74% of the way through. Okay? Because when I see that, then I'm like, okay, I can, you know, I can make it the next 26, I love that.

Pamela 00:47:40  Okay. So that's why we like. And plus she's got 15 minute videos, 45 minute videos. Like we can kind of pick. So weight training key. It's really helped me a lot like three times a week okay.

Sarah 00:47:52  For how long?

Pamela 00:47:53  depends. Depends on how much. 24 days. It depends on how much time I have. But we try and do like the 40s. But if we if I don't have time or I'm not motivated and I want to do a 20, we'll do a 20. I don't feel bad about it. We also are walking a lot.

Sarah 00:48:06  Yeah, because you live near the bike path.

Pamela 00:48:08  We live near exactly a chip path. We live near the strand. Walking is amazing. So I love that.

Sarah 00:48:14  Because it's you don't do her way to.

Pamela 00:48:16  Vest. I'm about to get one. Oh, because, you know.

Sarah 00:48:19  My husband, I'm wearing them.

Pamela 00:48:20  For I know, I know, I'm about to get what I think I'm going to go for a 1212.

Sarah 00:48:24  Mine's a ten. I could go 12. Okay, but mine's a ten.

Pamela 00:48:27  Okay, maybe I'll get to it.

Sarah 00:48:28  Depends on it. Depends on if you're doing inclines, like on the treadmill. I'm doing a really high incline with a £10 weight on. If I were just walking on the street, I could probably do 12.

Pamela 00:48:39  Yeah, I'm going to try it. So that's like next on my list.

Sarah 00:48:42  But make sure you figure out like which one because some of them are awkwardly uncomfortable. Oh, interesting. The one that I have. I'll share it with you. A friend just bought it too. I think I've probably sold 2000 of them, and I don't even know how to do the Amazon affiliate thing, which is a whole other story for another time, but I find it the most comfortable in terms of like boobs in your shoulders. It's just the easiest. It's like the best sort of kind of balance of weight everywhere.

Pamela 00:49:09  Okay, amazing.

Sarah 00:49:09  Yeah, I like it a lot about that.

Sarah 00:49:10  And my husband's looks like he works like for the Swat team. It's horrendous.

Pamela 00:49:14  I think it's such a cute look I love it.

Sarah 00:49:16  Yeah, but it's part of his brand. Yeah it is, but it's like very big. It's like he works for like the president's Swat team, you know, like he's like a Secret service. Secret service agent. That's not a good law. That's a.

Pamela 00:49:27  Good look. Like a Secret Service agent, doesn't he?

Sarah 00:49:28  With, like, the glass. Exactly.

Pamela 00:49:30  Got the thing cut. Look about him.

Sarah 00:49:32  Intense. He was like dying to get his hair cut for two weeks while we were away. He was like counting down the minutes until the lady showed up at her house yesterday and I was like, are you good now? Do you feel at peace? Like, you know, we all have our little OCD things? Yes, yes I do.

Pamela 00:49:47  Okay, so back to this. Yeah. So I'm active six days a week and even possibly seven.

Pamela 00:49:54  If you do.

Sarah 00:49:54  You walk on the days you do weights or you do both okay. So you.

Pamela 00:49:57  Do. But we're trying to walk after dinner okay. Great. Like that little extra bit of true. And for glucose getting.

Sarah 00:50:03  Help like insulin it's amazing amazing.

Pamela 00:50:05  Amazing amazing. So that has been helped.

Sarah 00:50:07  Sometimes I just don't want to talk to my husband though. Like I just like so he he talks the whole time and I'm like,

Pamela 00:50:14  Well then you can.

Sarah 00:50:15  I know I'm like just five minutes, just pick up dog shit sh you know, and he lets the dog like, you know, like he's like, oh he wants to sniff here. I'm like, I don't give a fuck where he wants to sniff. I just want to keep moving. Keep moving? Yeah.

Pamela 00:50:31  Sometimes we don't take our dog with us.

Sarah 00:50:33  Yeah, because he's like, oh, this is the place he pees. I'm like, I don't care where he pees. We're just like moving. So there's a little bit of that.

Pamela 00:50:40  So but keeping active.

Sarah 00:50:42  For sure.

Pamela 00:50:43  Super important. I'm doing not only, you know, pickle and then canasta, but I do puzzles. So that's really good for your brain puzzles? No. Like crossword puzzles, things like that. So I think those are good for your brain as well. I'm not. No, I used to do that. But I'm doing just like some of the puzzles on the New York Times, like Wordle. And that might be too.

Sarah 00:51:06  Hard for me. Get.

Pamela 00:51:07  Shut up. You're so.

Sarah 00:51:08  Smart. My son's weirdly, like.

Pamela 00:51:09  Too smart for me. No, but they're good. They're good. Brain exercise is my point. So that's something that I have incorporated into my routine. You know, I start my day with I've been doing creatine monohydrate. Yeah. Good for muscle.

Sarah 00:51:24  You do five milligrams or ten.

Pamela 00:51:26  I just do a scoop. Whatever the scoop is.

Sarah 00:51:27  It's probably.

Pamela 00:51:28  Five. so I'm doing that in my water. A lot of times I take a greens powder, especially if I'm traveling and I feel like I'm not eating well.

Pamela 00:51:37  So I'll do a greens powder and do.

Sarah 00:51:39  The athletic greens or a different brand.

Pamela 00:51:41  I do. Ag1. Yeah. And then, I am also taking, a good probiotic and prebiotic one I love.

Sarah 00:51:50  I know I take it every day it's the best. I haven't moved to two pills, though. I'm still at one because I feel like I'm going to have a bloated attack.

Pamela 00:51:57  Yeah, some people can't tolerate two immediately, so I take two. I'm taking a multivitamin for women 50 plus. I take vitamin D because I need it. I often take vitamin C because I just feel like I want to keep my immune system strong. And I think that that's what I'm taking. And then at night, I.

Sarah 00:52:19  Magnesium should.

Pamela 00:52:20  Show. Oh my God, first of all, the I, the magnesium. I can't live without it. Oh, my God.

Sarah 00:52:28  I take three different ones.

Pamela 00:52:30  Oh my gosh. Well, I'm taking one that has like three different types. I take.

Sarah 00:52:33  All three separately because I'm convinced you.

Pamela 00:52:36  Take moon juice. The magnesium.

Sarah 00:52:37  I don't know, because I feel like you need, like, such a high amount and like I take three pills of each one. And I got my bloodwork back, and he's like, you still need to up the magnesium. And I'm like, what? I'm like, all the proof.

Pamela 00:52:51  Is in the pudding. I know now that now you know. Yeah, but.

Sarah 00:52:54  I'm like, I'm taking six, three, nine pills and you're telling me I need to take more? Yeah, I know, it's kind of weird.

Pamela 00:53:00  Well, I've had to do a lot of vitamin.

Sarah 00:53:02  D is too high, though. he's like that possible because he said I'm taking too much. Wow. Yeah. So he's like, you gotta like, get off the. And I was too low before. So now he's like, okay, take a couple months off vitamin D, interesting Instagram. Husband needs to fucking take it because he thinks that playing tennis and golf and whatever outside is enough.

Sarah 00:53:21  Vitamin D and it's not his vitamin D is like in the basement. Wow.

Pamela 00:53:24  Yeah, well, I have to say, I have always protected my skin as you do with yours. So, you know I am. When I'm playing pickle, I'm wearing long sleeve shirts.

Sarah 00:53:35  And my husband started that with the gall.

Pamela 00:53:37  Yeah. I mean, once it gets to be really hot, I'm not going to be able to do that. But no, he did.

Sarah 00:53:41  It as much as I can. Golf.

Pamela 00:53:43  He's like, it's important. Yeah. He's like, listen, you're missing out on the vitamin D, but you know, at least I'm getting it on my legs. I just don't want it on my need to supplement.

Sarah 00:53:51  You need to take the supplement. That's it. And you need to take it with K, otherwise, supposedly it doesn't absorb. Yeah.

Pamela 00:53:57  So most people need it, you know, but your bloodwork will tell you if you need it or not. My blood work told me.

Pamela 00:54:02  Minded too. But then.

Sarah 00:54:03  I took too.

Pamela 00:54:03  Much. Yeah, but then, you know, you'll keep adjusting. Yeah. So I think, you know, we need sunscreen and at least on our faces, because it's going to destroy your face, so get it somewhere else. And then I've actually been driving with driving gloves.

Sarah 00:54:20  Oh, my God, that's my kids worst nightmare. It's because.

Pamela 00:54:23  Your skin. I get it on your hand is thin. And I started noticing I was.

Sarah 00:54:26  Carrying sunscreen around New.

Pamela 00:54:28  York. It's so much easier. Just throw some gloves on. I got these, actually. A friend of mine gave them to me. They're. Do they have Amazon? They have fingertips. Okay. And so I keep them in my car and I just wear them. You know I'm not wearing them at night.

Sarah 00:54:41  I mean I bring my own brush to get them blow dry. Like I'm not using someone else's brush. It's kind of like wearing gloves. Yeah, I get it.

Sarah 00:54:47  It's being extra.

Pamela 00:54:48  Thing.

Sarah 00:54:49  Yeah, it's totally being extra.

Pamela 00:54:51  And so I have nothing. I mean, I'm not embarrassed to wear them. So those are some you know, those are some of the things.

Sarah 00:54:56  No. Do you sauna.

Pamela 00:54:58  No I don't and I'd like to think about doing that. But here's what I have said to a couple of friends of mine where I try to pull back a little bit because I have gotten to that point in, in the past where I'm like, I there's so many things that you do.

Sarah 00:55:15  I mean, like, it's all day and sideways. No, I know my husband's on us. I don't.

Pamela 00:55:19  But but my point is that, like, I could be doing dry brushing. You could.

Sarah 00:55:23  Do it all.

Pamela 00:55:23  Day and, you know, I mean, all day and the wash. And you.

Sarah 00:55:28  Have to pick the things that you resonate with the.

Pamela 00:55:31  Most. This is a point that I do want to make, though, which is don't major in the minors.

Pamela 00:55:39  If you are not eating a good diet, if you're throwing a bunch of toxic crap in your body and on your skin and cleaning your house with toxins, if you're not drinking enough water, if you're not moving your body, if you're not managing your stress, if you're not finding time to be social. Don't skip the cold plunge right now. Yeah, totally. Because that is those are really those incremental things that you can do maybe to boost your health a little. And this is obviously my opinion. Yeah.

Sarah 00:56:13  No, but I think we're so used to like the Postmates delivery, the instant gratification that sometimes we think that like by jumping in the sauna for 20 minutes, we're going to erase the fact that we've been eating garbage for months. Right? It doesn't work. I don't listen to biohackers.

Pamela 00:56:28  I don't really follow trends. My eating has not really changed all that much. I'm very open minded. So and I respect other people, nutritionists or, you know, nutrition gurus or doctors that do change their minds over time given new information.

Pamela 00:56:47  I really respect that. So I too am very open minded and I'm not restrictive. But I will say if you are eating not a good diet and you're eating all this like diet food and garbage and chemicals and your focus is only on staying skinny, I think you're missing something.

Sarah 00:57:13  Yeah, I agree, and with social media, you're flooded with do this, do that, do this, do that.

Pamela 00:57:18  Oh my God, social media is exhausting.

Sarah 00:57:20  But at the at the end of the day, like you got to pick the tiny little things that you.

Pamela 00:57:24  Can, I, I these people that discredit some of these stupid influencers that are like 22 years old that literally are just spewing their opinion like.

Sarah 00:57:36  We don't believe in statins.

Pamela 00:57:37  I'm like anecdotal nonsense of like what worked for them and they're trying to and like, you've got midlife women in menopause, like listening to a 22 year old, I'm like, oh my gosh, I like shoot me totally. So I the misinformation that is in the cesspool of social media right now is honestly exhausting, right, people? Here's my message is like, you kind of know what to eat.

Pamela 00:58:05  You do.

Sarah 00:58:05  I mean, there's no do. We're all looking for that easy answer. Like, sure, it's great. Don't load on the carbs.

Pamela 00:58:12  Like, let me be. Let me be your Glinda right now to you, Dorothy. Yes. it's in you. You've known it all along.

Sarah 00:58:18  Yeah. There's no fucking shortcuts, people. It's not like.

Pamela 00:58:22  It's just like if a friend said to you, like, okay, it's just you and me now. We have no information. Like, what should we actually eat? Guess what? You're probably going to come up with the right answer.

Sarah 00:58:33  It's not the answers we want, though. We want someone you want to say, like, sure, eat gummy bears for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The sugar doesn't matter, the carbs don't matter, the blah, blah, blah. Look, I'm going to eat the red meat sometimes, and I know there's a hundred thousand people saying, don't eat the red meat, but there's 100,000 people saying, do eat the red meat.

Sarah 00:58:52  But so you got to do what feels good to you at the same time.

Pamela 00:58:56  But even there, like if you want to talk about red meat, there are some people that don't do well with red meat.

Sarah 00:59:00  I know, but it's not even weather.

Pamela 00:59:02  So it's not like you can't make blankets.

Sarah 00:59:04  No, I know.

Pamela 00:59:05  About these things anymore. Like, just stop the nonsense. There are some people that do not do well with red meat. But then how are you preparing the red meat? Did you Charcoal the shit out of it.

Sarah 00:59:16  Now it's like, now you're like a carcinogen. Yeah.

Pamela 00:59:18  You. Are you giving me a plate of carcinogens? Yes. So you can take that right back. Yeah. So, like, there are, you know, there's red meat and there's red meat.

Sarah 00:59:26  Totally. It's like finding that. It's like the middle. The good enough. What's going to work for you? It's hard. Okay. As we wrap up a couple things Botox, fillers etc..

Sarah 00:59:39  And then one piece of midlife advice to get women who are feeling a little bit stuck, maybe wanting to try something new. So let's start with the Botox situation.

Pamela 00:59:49  What do you want to know? I have no nothing.

Sarah 00:59:51  Yeah, that's what I'm saying. What are your what's your what's your thing? Do you do it. Do you not do it? I didn't think you did I?

Pamela 00:59:56  You know what? I'm. It's not that I'm against it. It's just that up until now, I just haven't felt the need for it. Okay, that said, I'm starting to feel like I'm. I might need to, because last time.

Sarah 01:00:09  We spoke, you weren't doing it. No, that's why I'm asking.

Pamela 01:00:12  Yeah, I'm. Here's what I'm waiting for. I'm waiting for something. Some kind of procedure. That is not that. Okay. Start doing okay. You know, like, I mean, I've got this. I'm like.

Sarah 01:00:25  I'm already signed up for a facelift. Probably for two years from now.

Pamela 01:00:29  This this little thing in my forehead does bother me. And like when I express, which I don't want to do because I don't want to encourage it. Right. It's getting to be to that.

Sarah 01:00:38  You can paralyze that very easily.

Pamela 01:00:41  I hate that, I hate that, but you can.

Sarah 01:00:43  Paralyze that in five seconds, you.

Pamela 01:00:44  Know? But, you know, here's the thing is, I'm very I'm sure if you've watched any of my social stuff, I'm actually very sensitive to a lot of chemicals in beauty products. Okay. Which I discovered when I worked for a beauty company many, many years. So you're freaked. I yeah, I mean, there's hair color that I'm allergic to. There's things that give me allergies. Like, I don't know what it is. Yeah. So I am a little bit apprehensive for, for me personally, I don't think that you should be. But like, for me personally, I don't know if I have yours.

Sarah 01:01:17  It's not a philosophical thing like I don't believe in.

Pamela 01:01:20  Oh, I think people should do what they want, I but.

Sarah 01:01:23  But even for yourself, it's not a philosophical thing. It's a more health.

Pamela 01:01:27  Yeah. Meaning? Like I'm scared. Yeah. I'm totally a little bit apprehensive. But I have seen some people's faces that have changed. Not for the better either.

Sarah 01:01:37  And my daughter was like, if you ever coming home looking like that, look like that. No way.

Pamela 01:01:41  I don't like that.

Sarah 01:01:42  So I've done it. So I did filler. Last time I did filler was two years ago. So if you're not like opposed to how I look.

Pamela 01:01:50  No, I think it's.

Sarah 01:01:51  Still an open season for you. Yeah. No.

Pamela 01:01:53  You look beautiful.

Sarah 01:01:54  Yeah, you look amazing. But I'm just saying it's like not going overkill. You can't keep going back for more and more and more. It's like knowing where your end is. Yeah. You know.

Pamela 01:02:04  No, I.

Sarah 01:02:05  Make it great. But, like, I'm at the point now where there's, like, there's no filler that's filling.

Sarah 01:02:09  It's like it needs to be actually scissored out, you know what I mean? Like, there is extra inches. I don't.

Pamela 01:02:15  Know yet. So, I mean, like, I look at my neck and I'm like, okay.

Sarah 01:02:18  I need like.

Pamela 01:02:19  Poly needs to be. Yeah. Yeah.

Sarah 01:02:21  Like one piece.

Pamela 01:02:22  Of duct tape. I don't know what you would do.

Sarah 01:02:24  No. You have to have a facelift.

Pamela 01:02:25  Yeah, yeah. My daughter does gouache and so she's convinced that you can, you know, stimulate like, collagen production and do facial exercises. And I'm like, oh, my God, face your thing.

Sarah 01:02:38  Yeah. No, no no, I know I don't do that. That's like two.

Pamela 01:02:40  I do have a gouache on stone. And I got into it for a little bit, but I need to layer that with a if.

Sarah 01:02:45  Somebody else does does the guajira for me. Right.

Pamela 01:02:47  And we're good or I need to like layer it with a habit that I stick to like religiously.

Pamela 01:02:52  Yeah. No, I know what I mean.

Sarah 01:02:53  It's like you floss.

Pamela 01:02:54  Every or maybe like when I'm making my matcha and I'm heating my totally. Right. That's when I wash off. Yeah.

Sarah 01:02:59  Like I take the seed probiotic when I'm making my coffee. So I have it there. That's exactly like the habit stacking the habit.

Pamela 01:03:07  Yeah.

Sarah 01:03:08  Yeah, exactly.

Pamela 01:03:08  You have hacking. Okay, so I'm not, like, the best person to ask about, you know, the fillers and stuff because I'm really not well versed on it. But again, I'm not opposed to it either. And maybe I'll get there myself. then you had asked me about just.

Sarah 01:03:26  One piece of midlife advice as we wrap up for women who maybe have tried starting doing something outside of their families, or they want to switch careers, or they're feeling like what's next for me, I feel stuck. I don't know what to do.

Pamela 01:03:40  Well, I mean, something that we did touch on in the first, you know, time that we had that conversation, which you alluded to was just like, you know, you even if you're scared, that's normal and it's okay.

Pamela 01:03:52  But if you do something that's scary, you're probably going to grow from that and it's probably worth doing right. And then again, you know, looking at things that it's experiments. But here's the advice that I want to say is that we are living in a time right now that has many opportunities that are non-traditional. So when I was growing up, you had really only traditional paths to follow in terms of work. You needed degrees to do things. You needed to be a lawyer or, you know, a teacher or a doctor or you know what I'm saying? Like, yeah.

Sarah 01:04:31  And you're out and.

Pamela 01:04:32  I want to be this. Yeah. And there are also areas that don't value the wisdom and the life experience of women or men that are past a certain age. Okay. So I'm just going to say that is true. And those are very often in kind of these more traditional corporate environments. There are so many more opportunities now that are nontraditional. Okay. You couldn't literally start a Substack and start writing about whatever it is is interesting to you and where you have wisdom and everybody can share something.

Pamela 01:05:19  So what is it that you talk about most of all? I mean, I have a friend who's obsessed with facials, facials and skin care, and she got a job working for a dermatologist, and that was just a couple of years ago. And now she's like, your husband.

Sarah 01:05:34  Could have a Substack on Tiki.

Pamela 01:05:36  I have suggested it to him.

Sarah 01:05:38  But it's like, yeah, yeah, I mean.

Pamela 01:05:40  You could have a social media account. You could, you know, I don't know what creative outlet.

Sarah 01:05:46  Totally.

Pamela 01:05:47  Yeah. But I mean, what what kind of where do you kind of see yourself spending more time in what capacity? And you don't have to think of it in terms of a five year plan either. I have actually pulled back From planning too much. I am a planner. I like to look out and think to myself, okay, these are my goals. But guess what? Life is moving so quickly. Things are being created so quickly that I don't even know what's going to be the next thing I.

Sarah 01:06:21  Thing like, who knows? Like, you know my life.

Pamela 01:06:24  Yeah. Did I see Substack as a possible, you know, income stream for me or, you know, business opportunity that I'd be interested in? No, that was not on my bingo card. And now I love it. Go.

Sarah 01:06:39  See, that would be a really good activity for me because it's like, you know, you don't have to fucking think. It's like a game of luck. It's like, oh, b7.

Pamela 01:06:47  Great. Yeah. You don't need other people to play with though.

Sarah 01:06:50  Yeah. Oh, yeah. Friends. Fine. But I don't have to, like, think it's like a game of chance. It's not a game of, like, mental gymnastics. I feel like canasta. Mahjong. You actually have to think that.

Pamela 01:07:00  This is true, right?

Sarah 01:07:01  Like you have some like.

Pamela 01:07:02  Yes, there's thinking involved, but that's kind of why it's a good thing.

Sarah 01:07:06  Because I remember in our first conversation you were talking about how at first you weren't sure exactly what you wanted to do.

Sarah 01:07:12  You were teaching the cooking class, and then maybe you started volunteering at a school with a garden. Tell us a little bit about that, and then we'll wrap up.

Pamela 01:07:21  Right?

Sarah 01:07:21  I mean, just to go to show like if you have a tiny little interest in something, it's not like you've been passionate about gardening in your whole life, but you went to the school, you volunteered and it turned into a thing.

Pamela 01:07:31  Well, right. So, I mean, I did start this cooking, you know, instruction. I was teaching this one group. I really, literally thought it was going to be a once a month.

Sarah 01:07:40  It's so.

Pamela 01:07:40  Funny. And then that you turned into I was on the board of a nonprofit which was in public schools teaching kids about nutrition and gardening. And so then I was not only on the board, but then I was like, you know what? I want to get in with the kids and get dirty. And I was teaching nutrition in schools. I was managing a garden at a public school and sort of at the same time, I was noticing that parents had a very different idea of what their kids would eat and not eat.

Pamela 01:08:14  So if the kids, you know, these parents were telling me like, oh, my kids have never eaten a salad. I'm like, I just saw them eat a salad. They've never they'd hate vegetables. They won't eat any green vegetables. I'm like, I saw them pull a radish and a carrot out of the ground, wash it and eat it. And they loved it. So like, I don't tell me what I saw. so. Or didn't see rather so, you know, I just noticed there was this, like, total disconnect. And people had so much fear about feeding their families and not being good enough. And like, I sort of, like, became this weird kitchen therapist in a way that. And that's a good way.

Sarah 01:08:52  Of describing.

Pamela 01:08:52  It. Yeah. Where I, I feel like I did a lot of courses, especially over the pandemic. And I still teach online. And I think one of the things that I do that is meaningful to me is helping people just accept that good enough is good enough.

Sarah 01:09:12  Bingo.

Pamela 01:09:14  Yeah. And we're all doing the best that we can. And it's. And it's good enough and.

Sarah 01:09:18  Take a chance. Oh, well. Yeah. And the whole idea of learning on the go. Because if you're waiting till you're ready, there's no ready. It's not like, oh, I want to start a podcast and now I'm a podcast.

Pamela 01:09:28  You wait until you're ready yet you you've waited too long. Yeah. I mean, even with respect to your podcast, I mean, don't you feel like you have improved your skills and, you know, this has changed and it's evolved.

Sarah 01:09:41  To.

Pamela 01:09:41  Evolve. You have to. And if you just trot out there and think that that's the product and that's what it's going to be, and that now it's perfect. Like, for sure you've waited too long. Yeah. And you also need to be open minded to.

Sarah 01:09:56  Everyone's like, why aren't you doing YouTube? I'm like, I don't know. It's like hard and it's weird, but I'm gonna try.

Sarah 01:10:02  I, you know, I and not everything's perfect. I'm like, well, I'm focusing on my podcast and like podcast downloads. But some people are like, yeah, but the space is YouTube right now, but I'm willing to try it. And I may not be like an overnight sensation.

Pamela 01:10:17  I do kind of hate when people are like that because, you know, one of my biggest mistakes was actually getting off YouTube because people are like, YouTube's dead.

Sarah 01:10:27  Oh yeah, you're dead.

Pamela 01:10:28  You're right. YouTube's dead. Okay, I'm going to get off YouTube. And then I moved to something else. And and so I got off YouTube and now it's kind of a thing. Yeah, it's.

Sarah 01:10:37  Kind of a thing. It's like a thing. Yeah. So it's like all this going back to the experimenting thing, I think that we have to experiment in our career slash passions. I think we have to experiment, maybe not outside of our marriages, but within our marriages of like, okay, we don't have any together activities.

Sarah 01:10:57  So we're going to experiment with some activities like pickleball, whatever. I think maybe the theme is kind of stepping off the hamster wheel, trying new things in whatever little areas there are, like wake surfing for me, like wake service.

Pamela 01:11:12  I mean, I never even thought about this, but my business is experimenting. Like I come up with new recipes and I'm like, I have no idea if this is going to work and if it doesn't, like I've wasted a few ingredients, it's probably still going to be like reasonably.

Sarah 01:11:23  And your husband will eat it and.

Pamela 01:11:25  He won't, but.

Sarah 01:11:26  Oh, he won't.

Pamela 01:11:26  Know he's annoying. Yeah.

Sarah 01:11:28  Oh, interesting. Mine would eat anything that was handed down.

Pamela 01:11:30  You're very lucky. Yeah. I mean, I'm lucky to. My husband's great, but he's not super open minded about food. That's a whole nother conversation for, like, our third.

Sarah 01:11:39  Oh, because he's a foodie.

Pamela 01:11:40  He's. No, he's not he. There are so many things that he doesn't eat.

Pamela 01:11:44  He's just like, oh.

Sarah 01:11:45  See, mine's on a foodie. So, like, you can hand him like toast. And he's like, cool. We're good.

Pamela 01:11:50  Early on in our marriage, I remember I was making dinner and he said something like, what's for dinner? And I said, you know, X, Y and Z. He goes, I'm kind of not in the mood for that tonight. I'm like, tough.

Sarah 01:11:59  Shit, I'll see you in my house. No one would ever fucking ask me what was for dinner. Like, is.

Pamela 01:12:04  Your daughter still.

Sarah 01:12:05  Cooking? Yeah, but she's in Europe. Yeah. So, like, my husband's like, what are we eating tonight? I was like, I don't know, there's a sweet potato from yesterday, you know, but he's, you know, he knew what he married. I'm not saying I can't get better. I'm going to go. You know, it's a constant evolution. I just got the Ninja creamy. I'm going to try to put the cottage cheese in and make fake ice cream or whatever.

Sarah 01:12:24  But that's my version of. Of cooking. I'm so happy you came.

Pamela 01:12:28  We always we can talk.

Sarah 01:12:29  I mean, we can talk for 50 hours. We can have like our own TV show. It could go on. I mean, like like crazy. We can have, like, a UTI. Yeah, we could have, like, a YouTube whole thing on, like, how to experiment through midlife cattle ball, canasta puzzles about it. Botox, no Botox, the whole thing. And we didn't even cover, like, midlife vaginas. And I don't even know how you're managing that without HRT. Wow. That's impressive.

Pamela 01:12:55  You know, here's what I am going to say about menopause is that there are a lot of different symptoms, and not everybody gets all of them. I know, so you're sitting there with a fan, and I have never really experienced the whole hot flash thing. Yeah. So I don't I'm fine. Like I'm in long sleeves long I mean I die, I'm, I mean I just played.

Sarah 01:13:15  Pickle napkin, I know.

Pamela 01:13:17  So I, I'm not like the hot flash girl. I've had other things I know.

Sarah 01:13:20  And then a lot of people say they're itchy and I'm like, I don't have the itch.

Pamela 01:13:23  No I don't, not actually.

Sarah 01:13:24  I'm dry at certain times, but not itchy.

Pamela 01:13:27  Yes. I don't metabolize alcohol.

Sarah 01:13:30  Exactly.

Pamela 01:13:31  Okay. And I do have a little bit of brain fog. And then my weight gain and then my perfect cholesterol spiked. So I'm trying to manage that. But I'm not.

Sarah 01:13:44  Hot. Let's see I, I but see I've taken Saturn's for a decade. Yeah. Like my cholesterol. My cholesterol was 283 when I was in college and I was eating only protein, no carbs, no sugar like my body. They sent all my lab work 100 years ago to Berkeley. Like I'm a cholesterol maker. I mean, I could eat just beans the rest of my life and I would still have high cholesterol.

Pamela 01:14:08  Are like that.

Sarah 01:14:08  But like, some people are, like, anti-state.

Sarah 01:14:11  And I'm like, oh, no, no, the party.

Pamela 01:14:12  Yeah. I have to say, most people should probably be honest.

Sarah 01:14:15  Yeah, my husband takes a different one than I.

Pamela 01:14:17  I'm not.

Sarah 01:14:18  He's taking I wouldn't be able to get out of bed like it's way to like, muscle pain inducing for me. But the one I take, I'm like, totally fine.

Pamela 01:14:27  Yeah, that's our next conversation. Let's talk about heart health.

Sarah 01:14:31  Oh, yeah. No, honestly, it's it's a major thing. Like we just did our, like, coronary scans. Now we have to go and do the MRI and the EKG like all of that. And I'm up for a mammogram. Like I'm like, is it you got to do all this yet?

Pamela 01:14:46  Stay on top of it. Yeah. You.

Sarah 01:14:47  That's the name of the game.

Pamela 01:14:48  Colonoscopy on top of it.

Sarah 01:14:50  I mean, we're up to say we have to stay in check. Yeah. I loved having you. Thank you so much for coming.

Sarah 01:14:57  Hey, peeps, it's me again. I listen to this episode with the one and only cooking instructor, bestselling author, and Instagram phenomenon Pamela Saltzman so I could summarize the golden nuggets for you to have actionable items to start using today. I know that when I listen to a long episode, I'm like, oh my God, I love that. And then I can't even fucking remember the specifics. This is why I come back and do a golden nugget. Summary. In this episode, we dig deep with our golden shit shovels in a midlife conversation about empty nest health routines and finding the next thing in midlife and so much more. Okay, Golden nugget number one experimenting through midlife, from experimenting through menopause to midlife passions and careers a huge theme in Pamela's life is experimentation. If you don't try something, how can you know it's for you or not? Especially if you're feeling stuck or itchy for that new thing, or you want to just try a new hobby. You have to just try it and you'll gather a lot of data on the way.

Sarah 01:16:02  And Pamela's own words do not overanalyze things. Don't question your interest in trying something. Don't hesitate because you might just not be good enough. You are enough. Look at decisions as an experiment because this is. This will take a lot of pressure off of yourself and off of the outcome. Try things, see how they work out, pivot when you need to and try something else. Get out of rumination station and step into action. It's hard, but it's good. Golden nugget nugget number two. Golden nugget number two. Start small. Okay, you guys, I know we're always talking about starting small. Pamela started out as a cooking instructor one day a month. If she was worrying about SEO on her website before she even started, she would have been too overwhelmed to even start. Things build up over time. There's no race. Don't compare your day one to someone else's year 15. We all know that getting started can often be the hardest part. This advice is amazing and it's a common theme with so many of my guests.

Sarah 01:17:08  Start with your interests. Research your interests. Look at what your strengths are. Ask yourself how you can inch towards your interest today. Plan a little, but not too much. Try it, then try something else. If you have to just start click, it will click Golden nugget number three Pamela's health routine Pamela recognizes that there is so much health care information and advice out there, especially on social media. From biohacking to dry brushing and everything in between, we can spend our entire fucking days checking off a long mid-life health to do list. But number one, no one has time. Wait. Hold on. Number one. No one has time for that. Number two. It's not necessary. Pamela's routine is all about working out straight and training and getting the right supplements in and all the right foods. She loves a good YouTube workout video. She doesn't take herself to the like limit of like, I can't fucking do this anymore. And she says bonus points if the instructor is not talking on the video.

Sarah 01:18:13  That actually made me laugh because I hate talking when I work out. She is a huge advocate for keeping her brain strong and active, so she has incorporated pickleball and has become a pickleball expert. Canasta and puzzles into her daily routine. Pamela caps her routine with amazing supplements, vitamin D and C, probiotics, magnesium. That's a big one for me, too. Creatine and Ag1 greens grains powder. Golden nugget number four. The non-traditional path. Pamela's advice is about recognizing all the opportunities. Wait, let me do that again. Golden nugget number four non-traditional path. Pamela's midlife advice is about recognizing all the opportunities in the non-traditional path that weren't always available to us, she said. There is so much to be explored beyond the corporate world jobs she would have never guessed ten years ago that Substack would be a way for her to make some income and keep all of her interests alive. She mentioned that she has a friend who was obsessed with skincare and facials, and now she got a job working for a dermatologist.

Sarah 01:19:20  Pamela was working in a school garden when she was interested in cooking, and it segued her into all of her platform and everything that she's doing right now. She just took one tiny step. There is so much out there, and you have to experiment because you never know where it can land you. Okay, you guys, the gold is dripping off these nuggets. Wait, we didn't talk about YouTube. Okay, Savannah, we have to include YouTube in all of the golden nuggets. Okay, you guys, not only have you just listened to this episode, but you can fucking watch it on YouTube. Yes, I'm on YouTube now. You asked for it. I'm doing it. So if you want to watch us go back and check that out, the gold is dripping off these nuggets. Grab it, use it. There are three things you can do. First, fucking subscribe to the podcast. Second, share it with some friends who like midlife shit. And third, write an Apple review.

Sarah 01:20:14  Yes, writing reviews is kind of annoying. It's an extra step, but guess what? It helps the podcast grow. DM me. You know, I always respond and of course follow my Instagram. Wait, I can't even speak. Oh, and of course follow my Instagram at the flexible neurotic duh. Love you talk soon.